Vincent Gallo Lusts After Teenage Palin Daughters [Gossip] .
Indie actor and proud Republican Vincent Gallo failed to shock and awe with his in-real-life blowjob scene with Chloe Sevigny in The Brown Bunny. But the scruffy about-town Gallo should be more discreet about what he says to people about how "hot" the Palin family daughters are. Our correspondent Molly Friedman ran into him at the Andres Serrano after-party last night:
Via Molly:
"Ever seen the younger one? Yeah, they're the best looking family I've ever seen," said Gallo. He said something about guns, so I asked, are you are you a Republican? He said "Yes." I said, "Why?" He said, "Why not?" I said, "I asked you first."
He said, "Look, have you seen that Palin family? She is so hot. And her daughters are so hot." I said, "Which one, the pregnant one [Bristol, 17] or the younger one [Willow, 14]?" He said, "Both of them. They're the hottest family I've ever seen." I said, "So are you a pedophile?" And he said, "I've been called worse things."The GOP must be thrilled to have him on their side.
Sexy Palin Ethics Investigation Update [Scandal] .
Governor Sarah Palin is, according to the Anchorage Daily News, "stonewalling" the investigation into allegations that she abused her power by firing the Alaska public safety commissioner. They also say Palin's lawyer is threatening to sic the secret service on the Alaska legislature's investigator. ABC reports that Alaska state senator Hollis French is now fast-tracking his investigation into the scandal, dubbed "Troopergate." But in MORE IMPORTANT NEWS: the guy Sarah Palin maybe had an affair with (it seems like she probably didn't?), her husband's former business partner, filed an emergency motion yesterday to have his divorce records sealed. The motion was denied! Hooray! [Alaska Trial Court Cases via Andrew Sullivan, who has become a madman.]
Elementary School Cancels Their Subscription to US Weekly [From The Mailbag] .
We just received a sternly-worded missive from the Orange Center Elementary School in Fresno, asking us to cancel their subscription to US Weekly. Presumably this is part of the wave of cancellations related to their totally controversial Sarah Palin coverage. This raises so many questions: what exactly is an elementary school doing with a subscription to US Weekly? And why did they e-mail us to cancel it?
From: Wayne Werning [redacted]
Date: Fri, Sep 5, 2008 at 4:03 PM
Subject: subscription
To: —--@gawker.comHello,
Please advise how our school can cancel its subscription to US
MAGAZINE so that we do not receive any more copies. Your publication
has become offensive.Thanking you in advance,
Orange Center Elementary School
3530 S. Cherry Ave.
Fresno, Ca 93706
WWD Staff In Uproar Over Being Made To Write Advertorial Fluff [Media] .
"Fashion Rocks" is Conde Nast's big advertorial extravaganza pegged to Fashion Week, when the magazine company can sell extra ad space to all its fashion advertisers in a fluffy, profile-heavy special supplements. But we hear that the staff of the Conde-owned WWD is currently embroiled in a mini-revolt, after they were ordered to write the copy for the 48-page Fashion Rocks supplement that went out with yesterday's issue. There's no reason an editorial staff should ever be made to write advertorial copy. The most egregious line-crossing of all: a full-page interview in the supplement with Richard Beckman, Conde Nast's own head of marketing.
Beckman, of course, would be the mastermind of the entire Fashion Rocks campaign, so what the hell is a fluff interview of him doing in a WWD-penned special supplement, posing as legit editorial copy? Staffers there are asking themselves the same thing. They feel that Mary Berner, who formerly led Fairchild and WWD before it was all absorbed into Conde Nast, would never have stood for such a thing.
On MediaPost yesterday, Ari Rosenberg decried the whole ongoing degeneration of the advertising/ editorial line. "Today's media-buying demand for a 'big idea' required to earn a media commitment, combined with a softer and more competitive environment, all driven by a sales force that has no idea who Henry Luce is, have publishers doing things not done before," he wrote.
Which leads to this:
[This week's edition of Jim Behrle's long-running kartoon serial is action-packed. The kats meet Sarah Barracuda! And they make a difference. Klick thru for family fun.]
"This Is Why I Only Date the Illiterate" [The Commies] .
As some of you perished earlier today, so too will some of you be honored. Six of you, specifically, who made us laugh and think and forget our many troubles this week. See who gets the gold stars after the jump.
From Jenniferhdaniel in http://gawker.com/5045413/wired-shows-how-your-magazine+profile-sausage-gets-made">Wired Shows How Your Magazine Profile Sausage Gets Made:
"That sounds about as cool as this:HOW A GAWKER COMMENT GETS MADE
Jenniferhdaniel sits at her desk with eighteen windows open, frantically hitting the refresh button and pretending to work on some stupid interview about some stupid small town bullshit when in actuality she is more entertained and intellectually stimulated reading things that Sheila wrote. She scrolls down and reads each comment, trying like hell to dream up some pun or compliment or even better something snarky to write on the board. Her phone rings. It is the county commissioner, the fire chief or the resident "tipster" who is really just the drunk gossip from the church, who is awesome, btw. As awesome as Gawker, actually. One time on Saturday she saw him answer his door in a neglige. She digresses. She checks the "preview comment" button after typing. She publishes her comment. She sighs and wishes she were Pope John Peeps II."
From Anissa Jones Shoots Smack! in The Dangerous Maverick:
"Interesting article Nick. Especially the point on who is better equipped to assume an executive position! I am secretly hoping that on John McCain's first day in office a small vietnamese man will walk up to the front gate of the White House, blow a dog whistle and McCain will push the button. Then I will finally get a day off from work."From The Girl Also Blogs (and Unfun!!!) in Writers! Stop Dating Each Other Now:
"This is why I only date the illiterate."From CodePink in Has the Internet Ruined Your Life? Let Tyra Banks Help You!:
"I hit Refresh hoping that lemonade will pour out of my mouse.Happened once or twice."
From The Dagrolord in Why Doesn't Anyone Watch Gossip Girl?;
"Gossip Girl manages the paradoxical:A gorgeous cast that is not in the least attractive."
And your Party Pick this week goes to hamburgerhotdog's work in http://gawker.com/5044569/factsheet-sarah-palin">Factsheet: Sarah Palin:
"She once killed a man in Juneau, just to watch him die."Congrats all! Have a pleasant, politics-free weekend!
Births, Deaths, and Un-Marriages? [Births, Deaths, And Marriages] .
We hear that the owner of a preppy douche-magnet bar in SoHo, engaged to marry next week, has called off the much-hyped Massachusetts wedding.
Me Gov You Long Time [Awfulness] .
Former Minnesota governor Jesse "The Body" Ventura (also a former pro wrestler) want gays to be in the military so he can get more sweet Fillipina poontang. Srsly. [Queerty]
The Week We Fire Walked With Bristol Palin [Week In Review] .
- So. No one (besides Ken Layne, who'd happily called her "America's Hottest Governor" some time ago and then forgotten all about it) had heard of this "Sarah Palin" character before, until last Friday. And now, would you look at that, 121k views. We talked about her all week, multiple times a day. Just click there and read all of it and feel ashamed of yourself, and us.
- Oh, also we talked about Gossip Girl.
- Oh, and Barack Obama is drunk, because he is Irish.
- We made fun of the New York Sun's crazy intern policy (which is really only marginally crazy, right?), and then we felt bad because they promptly (almost) folded. And then we made fun of them again!
- Meet the new class! And the other new class! You will not like either of them.
- Us—they're just like us! (As is Elle.)
- We love Peggy Noonan! We hate every other writer in New York.
- This truly was a week to make you love America. Possible first lady Cindy McCain maybe doesn't know who this Roe person is and why they're against wading. Olympic champion Michael Phelps is grabby. Seth Rogen is not allowed to receive simulated oral sex. Etc.
Six Fun Reminders To Start Boycotting The New York Post! [Kill Baby Kill] .
You know how doctors and elementary school principals all through the land are canceling their subscriptions to Us Weekly in the aftermath of the jihadist pinko rag's biased coverage of Sarah Palin? Well today we learned there may be a "silent majority" of folks who would be doing the exact same thing with the New York Post, right here in New York, but no one hears from them because they don't consume a few metric tons of gas just getting to work every day and are thus subjected to the presence of these innovative small businesses known as "newsstands" on a regular basis, and it is at these operations that liberal-leaning media consumers are casting their votes. "If I had a nickel for every friend of mine who told me they stopped buying the Post every time an election cycle hit," a Post employee told a Gawker operative todayâ¦well he'd probably be able to afford a copy of Italian Vogue! The point is, we know the Post's coverage of this Palin crap has been hard on all of you. Some of you may have quit reading it altogether! If so, here is some stuff you've missed. I scanned it in so we wouldn't have to link!
1. From a page of Post readers "sounding off" on Palin's performance in today's paper also featuring this profundity from one Joe DePascale, Brooklyn: Palin gave a great speech and shows that Obama is equivalent to Julie, the activity organizer on 'The Love Boat'
TO WHICH WE CAN ONLY SAY So uh, "Hoppy" is one of those WASP nicknames that would indicate you are a card-carrying member of the plutocracy? Because otherwise you should be scared too, assmunch!
2. MOTOWN MAYOR PLEADS GUILTY Under "pressure" from Obama. What is interesting about this piece is that it would appear to contain no original reporting, just a benign quote from an anonymous Obama aide quoted in the Detroit Free-Press and some bullshit from one of those "consultant" people who will say anything. But see, what actually happened was that Obama made a public call for Kilpatrick to step down — which is different from some backroom black machine politics "mounting pressure" bullshit the piece describes — and seriously, he wouldn't have bothered had some outfit called Freedom's Defense Fund not been running ridiculous, unfounded campaign ads claiming the two of them were "friends." Of course, the Post does not bother to tell you about that. But hey, did you know he was called the "hip-hop mayor"?
3. Michelle: 2 Is Enough This ran today opposite a small piece about how "community organizers" are upset about being slighted by Sarah Palin.
What it means: The Obamas, despite the fact that they are a lazy couple of community organizing whiners, can't handle any more than two children, because they are lazy and also "uppity," which is an old euphemism for "babykillers."
4. From yesterday's paper, wherein the Post convened a group of local women to watch the Palin speech.
To which we can only say: Jesus fuck where did they find these people?
5. From today's paper, because given twenty-four hours to digest and fully consider the content of Sarah Palin's speech, it is abundantly clear Sarah Palin looks like Audrey Hepburn. Not that you'd learn that in the SEXIST MAINSTREAM MEDIA.And, just to give you an idea how many pages we considered and turned down for entry to this list, here's a runner-up:
Monkey Menace Panders to McCain/Palin Crowd [FNFF] .
The damned moneys. Despite the warnings, the hundreds and hundreds of warnings, everyone insists on treating these near-human masterminds of evil as being just like us! After all, they can handle firearms, but they are also breeding with our innocent pigs. Now that John McCain and scandal-bot Sarah Palin are wooing the family values crowdâwhile forcing that crowd to disown everything they every saidâthe monkeys have found a way into the heart of the Christian Right. The little wicked creatures are MARRYING!
MAYBE the dress wasnât the right size, or perhaps it was the grey and gloomy weather - but these two monkeys donât seem over-the-moon after being married in China.
The downcast-looking pair tied the knot in a special wedding ceremony at their zoo.
The monkeys - who live in Wenling, Zhejiang province - are seven-year-old male monkey Wukong and a six-year-old female named Xiaoya.
The widlife park organised the wedding in the hope of attracting more visitors, local media reported.
But the controversial stunt is bound to upset animal rights groups in a country famed for being cruel to animals. Back in 2006 a Shanghai zoo cancelled a show dubbed the âAnimal Olympicsâ following accusations of cruelty from animal welfare groups. [Nation.com.pk]
Help Find This Missing Woman [Emergency] .
You might have seen this plea and this message on many, many webpages this weekend. 23-year-old school teacher Hannah E. Upp went missing from her Harlem apartment on Friday and police are looking for anything that might lead them to her. Click through for a larger photo. If you have seen her or heard anything about her, please call Det. Perez at the 30th Precinct, at 212-690-8842, or at 212-690-8843. Someone must have seen or heard something. You do not have to give your name to give your information. Please step up and tell what you know. This is actually important. And anyone using this thread to make a certain old complaint about the media and missing people, you'll get banned instantly.
Charges Dropped Against Cop Assault Cyclist [Justice] .
The cyclist who was riding through Times Square during July's Critical Mass ride when a thug cop viciously slammed him to the pavement has been cleared of all charges. Although Officer Patrick Pogan claimed in court documents that Christopher Long intentionally steered his bike into him, the Manhattan District Attorney has joined with the rest of the city in telling Pogan, "Fuck you, guy." Pogan charged Long with attempted assault, resisting arrest, and disorderly conduct. As the tape shows, that's just a whole bunch of crap. Which presents a little problem for the officer.
"Although I am pleased with District Attorney Morgenthau's decision to
dismiss the charges against cyclist, Christopher Long, the D.A. now needs
to bring perjury & assault charges against this police officer," says
civil rights lawyer Norman Siegel. "This will send a strong message to
prevent future police misconduct and bring more accountability for police
behavior."Time to get your union guy on the phone, Officer Pogan.
OMG! Go Stalk the Cast of Gossip Girl! [Opportunities] .
If you weren't planning to go drinking on the Lower East Side next Tuesday evening, change your plans. This photo was taken on the corner of Ludlow and Rivington last night, warning locals that Gossip Girl will be shooting in the area starting at 8:00 p.m. Tuesday. Who will be there? Blake? Chace? Teamsters? Maybe you know someone with rooftop access and you happen to have a carton of expired eggs handy! Unless Michelle Trachtenberg is still on the show, in which case back off. No one touches Dawny! Click through for bigger pic.
Robert Giroux, Publisher [R.i.p.] .
Robert Giroux, who helped build one of the most important publishing houses of the 20th Century, Farrar, Straus & Giroux, died in his sleep yesterday morning at an assisted living facility in Tinton Falls, NJ. He was 94. The legends that he published amount to a stunningly daunting list that includes T.S. Eliot, Flannery O'Connor, Seamus Heany, Bernard Malamud, Jack Kerouac, Susan Sontag, and George Orwell."'The single most important thing to happen to this company was the arrival of Bob Giroux,' [Roger] Straus, who died in 2004, once said."
Giroux joined Farrar as editor in chief [in 1955] and was made a full partner in 1964, his reserved demeanor in contrast to the company's boisterous founder and president, Roger Straus. Straus and Giroux thrived together even as they endlessly complained about each other, with Straus regarding Giroux as a snob, and Giroux looking upon Straus as more a businessman than a man of letters.
During Giroux's 60-year career, some of the world's most celebrated writers published works for FSG, including Nobel Prize winners Isaac Bashevis Singer, Derek Walcott, Nadine Gordimer and Seamus Heaney. Authors were known to turn down more money from competitors for the privilege of being signed on by Farrar, Straus [...]
Able to work with relative freedom, Giroux was still a strong critic of contemporary publishing, which he believed had become too money-minded. "Editors used to be known by their authors," he observed in a 1981 lecture. "Now some of them are known by their restaurants."
Among the debut novels he worked on were Malamud's "The Natural," Jack Kerouac's "The Town and the City" and O'Connor's "Wise Blood." Giroux also edited Susan Sontag, Robert Lowell and Hannah Arendt.
But Giroux did miss out at least twice. In the early 1950s, a young writer ("very tall, dark-haired, had a horse face") arrived unannounced to the Harcourt offices with a novel about a disenchanted prep school student. Giroux was immediately interested, but a Harcourt executive overruled him, saying the publisher's textbook department had read the book and passed on it, thus rejecting J.D. Salinger's "The Catcher in the Rye."
Around the same time, another young writer appeared at Harcourt, carrying what Giroux would remember as "rubbery sheets, ... teletype sheets pasted together." The author unfurled the scroll on the floor, revealing a story that ran more than 100 feet long, in a continuous paragraph.
When Giroux complained he couldn't possibly edit such a work, the writer called him a "crass idiot," rolled up his goods and hurried out.
So departed Kerouac and his manuscript for "On the Road." [HuffPo]
Eco-Hippies Mourn Dead TreesâTo the Extreme! [Video] .
Yes, deforestation is a terrible problem and may ruin the earth, but this is just a bit much. Members of the environmentalist group Earth First communed in the woods of North Carolina recently to scream and cry at the tops of their lungs for the brethren flora. Either that, or some hoaxers created a prank video to make Earth First look even whackier than it already has with its "tree sits" and such. I can't decide. Judge for yourself after the jump.
The Racist Miley Cyrus Death Hoax [Shut Up, Digg!] .
Some little assholes used Digg and Wikipedia to spread the lie that teen actress Miley Cyrus had died in a car accident last night caused by "an unidentified black man"âand Yahoo News picked up the story. The hoax was short-lived, thank God. By this morning, it was hard to tell who, if anyoneâaside from Yahooâactually fell for it. One of the only mentions of it as anything but a scam seems to be this retarded Digg entry. So did anyone else actually buy it?
As evidence that rumors of Miley's demise "are swirling around the internet" GaySocialites.com points to this story at the Post Chronicle. But the Chronicle's item is itself just a denial of the rumor.
"This report is a hoax planted by cruel pranksters on Digg.com and the ever reliable Wikipedia.com. Miley Cyrus is very much alive. As per the report, Miley Cyrus died in a fatal car crash on the way to the set of Hannah Montana. The report goes on to state that the young starlet was on her way to the filming of the upcoming 'Hannah Montana' Series when her vehicle was reportedly hit by a large truck, according to internet reports."
Yet the only "internet reports" that the Post Chronicle offers up is this one from ThaIndian.com, which again clearly states that Miley is very much alive. That report links to the UrbandLegends blog, which offers a screen-grab of the notorious Yahoo News story. As UrbanLegends points out, Yahoo News sites as its source "Rueters" [sic].
Conclusion: Digg and Wikipedia should die.
Alec Baldwin Doesn't Take Any Shit From Scientologists [Hot Heads] .
Lovable madman Alec Baldwin has so many feuds going on with so many people that he can no longer attend to them one at a time. The 30 Rock star published a fine, blustering anti-McCain/Palin piece on today's Huffington Post ("We know nothing about Sarah Palin. Nothing. Which is not anywhere near enough information to elevate her to the position whereby she would succeed McCain if he died in office or suffered a catastrophic illness. At 72 years of age and in questionable health, McCain's fitness to coach a high school football team would be in doubt, let alone the grueling reality of the presidency of this country.") and then he took a post-script detour to get in a last minute shot at one of his enemies at NBC by making fun of the guy's celebrity religion.
Baldwin had recently taken NBC to task for failing to give 30 Rock the PR treatment it deserves while, "They've gone out of their way to wring the last drops out of 'My Name Is Earl' and 'Scrubs.' Those shows are done! They're cooked! Yet they do a one-hour episode of 'Earl.'"
Earl creator and Scientologist Greg Garcia responded, "(Baldwin) sounds like a psychotic narcissist. Instead of blaming NBC, I think Alec should consider that some people in America may not want to watch a man who cusses out his own 11-year-old daughter on a phone message."
Never one to let an enemy have the last word, Baldwin summed-up his political essay with: "PS: My apologies to the cast and crews of My Name Is Earl and Scrubs. In my frustration with NBC's reprehensible promotion of 30 Rock, I took an unfortunate swipe at both of those shows and that was not cool.
"But, for Earl's creator, Greg Garcia, who referred to me as a ;psychotic', I have only one question. Why are you Scientologists always rendering these medical opinions you aren't qualified to give?" [HuffPo]
Today's Sarah Palin Madness [Sarah Palin] .
(1) The folks at CollegeOTR have designed this nifty "Caribou Barbie" Sarah Palin doll. But relax, conservative pervs and self-loathing liberals, it's just a prototype. (2) Wired is reporting that the VP hopeful has joined the ranks of Britney Spears and Lindsay Lohan with "Sarah Palin Bikini Photos," "Sarah Palin Nude," and "Sarah Palin Naked" fast becoming top Google search terms among our frazzled citizens. (3) Oh, and the blog LaProgressive.com is claiming that she called Barack Obama "Sambo."
âSo Sambo beat the bitch!â
This is how Republican Vice Presidential nominee Sarah Palin described Barack Obamaâs win over Hillary Clinton to political colleagues in a restaurant a few days after Obama locked up the Democratic Party presidential nomination.
According to Lucille, the waitress serving her table at the time and who asked that her last name not be used, Gov. Palin was eating lunch with five or six people when the subject of the Democratâs primary battle came up. The governor, seemingly not caring that people at nearby tables would likely hear her, uttered the slur and then laughed loudly as her meal mates joined in appreciatively. [LaProgressive]
Greg Garcia Responds to Baldwin: 'I'm Not a Scientologist.' [Exclusive] .
The latest salvo in the ongoing battle between 30 Rock star Alec Baldwin and My Name is Earl creator Greg Garcia is being waged right here on Gawker. Garcia sent us his response to Baldwin's early morning swipe, in which he goofed on Garcia for being a Scientologist. "Alec, I can't tell you how happy I am to once again point out that you are an idiot. I'm unable to answer your question about Scientologists because, although I respect anyone's right to their own beliefs, I am not currently nor have I ever been a Scientologist. Maybe you should have done some research that extended past the comments section of Defamer before you crafted your insult."
"If you choose to attack me again may I suggest something witty about me creating the show Yes Dear or just simply a joke about the fact that Iâm bald. Both true.
"As far as you being psychotic, anyone who thinks NBC wouldnât do everything they could to promote a great show like 30 Rock, which they own, over a show like My Name is Earl, which they donât, is a tad nutty.
"Good luck with the Emmys and donât forget to tune in for the one hour season premiere of My Name is Earl September 25th."
I asked Garcia how it was so many blogs had decided he was a Scientologist. "It started with a story in [the London] Mirror," he said, which had pronounced him a Scientologist because several Earl cast members are Scientologists. "It amused me and, since then, it's just become common knowledge. But I am in fact born and raised Catholic."
Times Celebrates Alcoholism [Happy Hour Servicey!] .
Today's New York Times wants you to know about a lovely-sounding new intoxicant that just might be worth braving the Lower East Side for. For centuries people in many parts of South America have been gathering to drink the tea of the yerba mate plant, which is traditionally served in a gourd, sipped through a silver straw and passed around "like a bong in a dorm room" to cure stomach trouble and nervous disorders. Now, Yuppies and hipsters are gathering at Manhattan watering holes and drinking the elixir mixed with Chilean grape brandy and fruit juice to "cure nothing save the stress and ennui of urban life."
If I was supposed to pass it around the bar, Iâm sorry. Itâs way too good for sharing: a froth of sweetened citrus underlaid with the yerba matéâs grassy, smoky flavors, which come across more herbal than tea-like. Those herbal notes are what drew [bartender Artemio] Vasquez, who was born in Oaxaca, Mexico, to yerba maté. "My mother always used herbs, like epazote, to give her cooking a little punch," he said.
But yerba maté boasts another kind of punch. Itâs a mild stimulant, with a mellow but palpable caffeine content. âThatâs the little trick in there,â Mr. Vasquez admitted. You could call Mr. Vasquezâs pisco maté a Red Bull and vodka for people with functioning taste buds. Heâs not alone in his discovery: At Tailor, in SoHo, yerba maté is also paired with pisco, in the maté sour, a foamy take on the traditional pisco sour. And maté meets cachaça plus muddled limes and honey syrup in the gaucho fizz at Savoy, also in SoHo.
Are we on the cusp of New Yorkâs maté moment? Mr. Vasquez is betting so. He ordered another 50 of those little gourds.Helpful cocktail recipe here.
Best Cities for Singles: Forbes' Wrongest List Ever [Listicle] .
Aways handy with a dubious listicle, Forbes magazine is presenting us with its ranking of America's "Best Cities For Singles." Could Atlanta really be No. 1? Maybe! Dallas at No. 3? Perhaps! But there is no way in hell New York City should come in 8th place. Why? For the same reason this list ranks NYC as number one in the "Cool" category.
Cool people stink! Being in the same room with a cool person is enough to make a decent person vomit. Good God, have you ever tried dating one? And have you ever met any happy singles above the age of, say, 27 in Manhattan or Brooklyn (because we know they're not talking about any other boroughs when they do a list like this) who isn't quite fucking miserable?
Bosh, Forbes magazine! Bosh I say!
Also? Even if NYC does suck, Boston and San Francisco are a much, much worse. Whew. That is all. [Forbes]
Oh No. Times Lets Writer 'Reflect' on 9/11 [Please Stop?] .
Everyone's nightmares and memories about the Sept. 11 attacks on the World Trade Center are important. And every year a few people and their memories are deemed more important than everyone else'sânot survivors or rescuers, just folks who had been in New York, somewhere, at the time. And every year we're expected to read their important memories in periodicals like The New York Times and The New Yorker. And every year it's just very sad, strangely insulting, not soothing and, in the end, rarely enlightening. There's this, for instance: "I remember the weekend before. A friend was visiting. We went to Chinatown for dinner on Mulberry Street, then walked north to Little Italy, stumbling into the Feast of San Gennaro. My friend kept eating things, suddenly in street-food heaven. I remember him gnawing on a big brick of nougat. I remember I had dinner plans for Tuesday. I remember the general panic, my wife and me stocking up at the Food Emporium a block from our Upper East Side apartment, buying provisions almost at random. (Salmon steaks â why not?)."
After 9/11, I abruptly abandoned a novel (a lighthearted comedy!) I was working on. Any meaningful fiction, I decided, would have to address the attacks; at any rate, a lighthearted comedy would not go anywhere in such a climate.
A few months later, out of nowhere, I devised a plot involving trapped survivors, working myself into a mild frenzy over the idea before realizing, in silent embarrassment, that it pretty much recapitulated the major points of Graham Greeneâs âEnd of the Affair,â set during the London blitz [...]
Another friend writes: âI think after about the fourth anniversary I actually had to make myself remember that that day was the day. And this didnât sadden me (or make me feel like a monster); rather it made me feel sort of impressed, actually, that something that I experienced as so horrible could actually recede into the safety of history. Now it can be experienced on two planes â intellectual and emotional.â [NYT]Yes, thanks for that.
One More Thing: New York City in Movies and TV [Nostalgia] .
A location can be as much the star of a movie or television show as the actors and actresses whose names top the credits. And New York is perhaps the biggest star ever (Yes, I know there are many other starry cities, but tonight we're doing NYC). So, what's your favorite movie or TV show where the Big Apple and its culture, sensibility, and aesthetic is intrinsic to the narrative? Mine is after the jump.
Gary Coleman Runs Down Annoying Fan [Celebrity Justice] .
Diff'rent Strokes star Gary Coleman had just finished a wholesome evening of bowling with his wife and his bodyguard in lovely Payson, Utah, yesterday when 24-year-old punk Colt Rushton approached him in the parking lot and demanded that the actor pose for a cellphone picture with him. Coleman refused, Rushton would not back down, and it ended like it always ends when some fool steps to Gary fucking Coleman: with the perp flat on his ass.
Rushton claims that Coleman's wife snatched his cellphone from him and that Coleman threw down on him in a series of blows. Then, says Rushton, he was merely trying to retrieve his phone when Coleman backed his truck into him, sending him to the asphalt. According to Coleman's bodyguard, Fred, it was all the kid's fault.
âHe asked the kid not to take pictures. Why canât he be an adult and respect his [Colemanâs] privacy,â said his bodyguard. The bodyguard, weâll call âFred,â says the harassment continued outside as Coleman and his wife tried to leave. âThis kid would not back offâhe would not back off.â
Police say Colemanâs truck struck Rushton and hit a car that had pulled up behind Colemanâs truck. Fred says Rushton ran around the actorâs pickup as Coleman was backing out. âThe kid was way careless. He was reckless. Who runs out on somebody thatâs turning?â
âHe did not intentionally hit this kid,â said Fred, âHe [Coleman] was just trying to get out of here.â Payson Police say a County Deputy witnessed the scuffle and intervened. âHe opened the door and pulled Gary out,â said Fred. Fred says the truck was still in gear when the deputy pulled Coleman out. It was heading toward Rushton who was still on the ground. Fred says he hopped in and put on the brakes. [ABC4]No arrests have been made and the matter is still under investigation. The police, shockingly, suspect that alcohol may have played a part.
GOP Convention Brings Gay Nightlife Surge to Twin Cities [Grand Old Party] .
A campaign official for Virginia's Lieutenant Governor cancelled an order for 150 tourist guides on Minneapolis-St. Paul when she discovered they included a section on gay and lesbian nightclubs. "'Having a section dedicated solely to GLBT will be a BIG problem for many of our folks. We simply can't hand them out,' wrote the aide, Melissa Busse, in an email to the guidebook publisher, Rake Publishing." However, all those God-fearing Republicans stumbling into town had Twin City's gay clubs overflowing with out-of-towners.
"'We've had quite a spike, mostly people who are curious come down and they wind up leaving and having a good time,' said Robert Parker, the manager of the Gay 90's club in downtown Minneapolis which features a popular 'drag queen' show. 'Mississippi, Alabama, California, Arizona, I've seen people from all over,' said Parker."
As for the Virginians and the tourist guides they refused to collect, Parker says, "Shame on them. [The club] is all about inclusiveness, including everybody no matter who and what you are, and I think if perhaps Republicans come and see that and they would come in and see that the world could be that way, and they may learn something."
"In a statement, Virginia Lt. Gov Bolling said he was sorry the cancellation occurred 'and wish it had not happened.' He said the delegation would reimburse the publisher for his costs." [ABC News]
Barack Roll Becomes McCain's Worst Nightmare [Video] .
The man who brought us Barack Roll is back with a hilarious treat. So John McCain gave his big Republican nomination acceptance speech in front of a giant video screen. What could possibly go wrong with that? See it after the jump.
Matt MacConaughey's Neighbors Fear His Awesome Influence [Dudemeister] .
Awesome dude Matthew MacConaughey is a man of simple pleasures. He likes to smoke a little something, enjoy a frosty beverage, play some bongos, and ride some tasty waves. So why are his Malibu neighbors getting all, like, uptight and totally hassling bro in the press? His surf buddy fans already did them all the favor of clearing the beach of pesky paparazzi by handing the shutterbugs some righteous beatdowns. Well, it seems the no-fun-loving neighbors are worried about the children. Won't someone please, please think of the children?
They're concerned that their precious sun-kissed tots, who naturally adore the easy-going movie star, will be driven to drink after watching him lounging around the beach and having a few brews.
"Matt is rarely seen without a bottle or can of beer in his handâhe likes to unwind with friends. They surf and down beer after beer," says a tipster.
"The kids who play on the beach think Matt's cool because he's in movies. [The parents] don't want their sons and daughters watching Matt get tipsy. Matt thinks they are overreacting. He says he's a dad, too, and they should mind their own business." [Star]
Dear McCain/Palin: Cool People Hate You, So Stop Stealing Their Music! [Thieves] .
John McCain, Sarah Palin, and their campaigners, just won't take a hintâor a flurry of cease-and-desist orders from all the musicians whose music they keep stealing for their nauseating "maverick" campaign. Last week, Van Halen had to tell them to STFU when the campaign started using the song "Right Now" totally without permission. Before that, Jackson Brown and John Mellencamp had to force McCain's minions to stop blasting their tunes on the campaign trail. So what did the McCain morons think was going to happen when they tried to make Heart's "Barracuda" Sarah Palin's theme song without getting the band's permission? Well, what has happened is that the psycho-eyed Veep wannabe now has a nickname based on a song she can never play at a public event again. Ha!
The band says on its website: "Ann and Nancy Wilson of Heart have informed the McCain/Palin Campaign that Universal Music Publishing and Sony BMG have sent a cease-and-desist notice to not use one of Heart's classic songs 'Barracuda,' as the congratulatory theme for Sarah Palin. The Republican campaign did not ask for permission to use the song, nor would they have been granted that permission. We have asked the Republican campaign not to use our music. We hope our wishes will be honored."
And, on a more personal note: "Sarah Palin's views and values in NO WAY represent us as American women. We ask that our song 'Barracuda' no longer be used to promote her image. The song 'Barracuda' was written in the late '70s as a scathing rant against the soulless, corporate nature of the music business, particularly for women. (The 'barracuda' represented the business.) While Heart did not and would not authorize the use of their song at the RNC, there's irony in Republican strategists' choice to make use of it there." [ABC]
Nobu Busted for Secretly Selling Endangered Sushi [Hypocritical Dining] .
Nobuâthe sushi restaurant chain co-owned by Robert Deniro that caters to celebrities like Madonna, Leo DiCaprio and Sean Combsâhas been busted in an undercover sting for selling critically endangered Atlantic bluefin tuna while concealing it from customers. Greenpeace sent spies to three London Nobu franchises, where they specifically ordered the near-extinction fish, and were told that the restaurants didn't stock it. But the cunning Greenies took their sushi back to the lab, where DNA tests revealed that the restaurants were indeed serving bluefin to moneyed gourmands. It's legal to serve bluefin, but people who claim to care about the environmentâlike Deniro, DiCaprio, Combs and Madonnaâwould supposedly never knowingly touch the stuff, preferring instead the less endangered, but less delicious, yellowfin. Which explains Nobu's sneakiness.
Nobu does not specify on its menus which species of tuna it serves. Requests for the information by campaigners have been met for several years with a terse "no comment".
Although it is not illegal to serve Atlantic bluefin, also known as northern bluefin, many chefs, including Gordon Ramsay, have dropped it because of concern that fishing is at higher levels than stocks can withstand. At Nobu Berkeley St, which has one Michelin star, investigators asked for Atlantic bluefin (hon maguro in Japanese) but staff told them the restaurant did not stock it. However, DNA tests proved that the fish they were given was indeed Atlantic bluefin.
[A] second dish they ordered, described only as "o-toro", the fattiest belly meat, was Atlantic bluefin. At Nobu London, a waitress told the investigators that a dish on the menu was hon maguro. The fish that was served tested positive as Atlantic bluefin.
The lack of clear information about the species of tuna on sale at Nobu could land the restaurants in trouble. A spokesman for Westminster city council said that falsely describing food was an offence.
Willie Mackenzie of Greenpeace said: "Nobu and Robert De Niro are clearly making a great deal of money serving up endangered fish." The restaurant declined to comment. [Telegraph]
Team McCain Chooses Charles 'Softball' Gibson for First Sarah Palin TV Interview [Fail] .
Well, the press can stop wondering when and where Sarah Palin's first post-nomination television interview will take place. A campaign adviser says they offered ABC nightly news anchor Charles Gibson the job days ago. That's the same Charles Gibson who was last seen being "greasily avuncular and patronizing" when he and his ABC cohort George Stephanopoulos were ruining the Democratic primary debate back in April. You know, the ABC-sponsored event about which a New Yorker scribe wrote, "Seldom has a large corporation so heedlessly inflicted so much civic damage in such a short space of time... If Gibson and his partner, George Stephanopoulos, had halted their descent at the level of the fatuous, that would have been bad enough. But there was worse to come."
Palin is expected to do the interview in the middle of this week, when she gets back to Alaska. The ABC/Gibson treatment will probably suit campaign manager Rick Davis, who has been whining that the press dares to ask questions about Palin's beliefs and record, but insisted on Fox News this morning, "She's not scared to answer questions."
Joe Biden, meanwhile, challenged Palin on today's Meet the Press, saying, "Eventually she's going to have to sit in front of you like I'm doing and have done. Eventually she's going to have to answer questions and not be sequestered. Eventually she's going to have to answer questions about her record." [Newsweek]
Yeah, but not on Meet the Press.
Britney's Mom Throws Down on Awful Svengali Scum [Sam Lutfi] .
Britney Spears' mom has a tell-all book coming out which is sure to become a Lifetime Network original movie. In it, Lynn Spears accuses the singer's former "manager"âcontrol freak and all around vile-sounding humanâSam Lutfi of grinding up pills and secretly dosing Britney to keep her docile while he insidiously took over her life. He also allegedly threatened that the troubled pop star would be heading to the morgue if he was ever out of the picture: "If you try to get rid of me, she'll be dead and I'll piss on her grave," Lynn says Lutfi told her just days before Britney's forced stay at a psychiatric facility.
According to Lynn, Lutfi once kept Britney "quiet for three days" by lacing her food with ground sleeping pills. He also, says Lynn, controlled Brit by convincing her that only he could help her win back custody of her kids.
"Take the pills. You should do what I tell you to see your babies," Lynn says Lutfi warned Britney.
"She was sad, floundering, ripe for a predator to come along. Britney was open to this man who rode in on a white horse.
"Within a month of meeting, Sam was in complete control of [Britney's] life. He appointed himself as her gatekeeper, and there was no one he wanted to keep the gate closed to more than Britney's family," Lynne writes.
The elder Spears also accuses Lutfi of disabling Britney's cars (which was probably for the best), hiding her cell phones and chargers, and, bizarrely, hiding her pet dog London from her and then producing the animal and claiming to have found it himself.
A judge eventually issued a restraining order against Lutfi and Britney's dad Jamie now oversees her affairs. [NYP]
Cool Graffiti Shadow Art [Photography] .
"I saw this walking home from the train station after I was at the Speakeasy Illustration show in Toronto. The crosswalk box thing made this shadow on the ground and someone drew a most perfect Batman face on it! I laughed so hard when I saw it. So unexpected and awesome! Spotted near the corner of Iroquois Shore on Trafalgar road in Oakville Ontario." [flickr via Neatorama]
Triumph the Insult Comic Dog Visits the RNC [Clip] .
Granted, this ckip of Late Night With Conan O'Brien star Triumph the Insult Comic Dog's trip to the Republican National Convention is a couple days late. But, hey, it just went up on Youtube yesterday. And besides, as NBC always says, if you haven't seen it yet, it's new to you! The Fox News/Ann Coulter strap-on joke alone is worth watching. Canine comedy after the jump.
Reporter Goes Crazy, Frantically Masturbates in Public [Media Matters] .
The 24 hour news cycle affects everyone differently, and horribly. A television reporter in Hong Kong has resigned after he was caught committing self-love on the top tier of a double decker bus. Former Asia Television journo Chiu Yu Kit admitted to the act in court, but explained that he was merely trying to "ease his stress" when an off-duty cop caught sight of him standing up on a seat facing the window and taking in the local color while taking care of himself.
A judge put Kit on a one year good behavior bond and suggested that he take up exercise or socialize with other people to relax. But, as everyone in the media knows, spending time with other media people only makes things worse! Look what happened to Lou Dobbs!
The article also notes that, last month, "a 'lonely and disturbed' Hong Kong man became stuck and had to be freed by emergency services after attempting to have sex with a park bench."
Things are tough all over. [Straits Times]
One More Thing: Los Angeles in Movies and TV [Nostalgia] .
Last night's New York movies and TV post seemed to make people happy, so it would be kind of unfair to ignore our main competition as a location for silver and little screen productions. Besides, it's a wise blogger who holds onto a promising theme until it's bled dry. So! La-la Land, Hollywood, City of Angels... the choices are practically endless. Heck, that's where they make all the movies and TV shows! What's your favorite? I'll get us going after the jump.
MSNBC Kneecaps Olbermann To Fake Neutrality [Shouting Heads] .
It was unthinkable that MSNBC could come out of the Democratic and Republican National Conventions without a major, public shakeup of its political news team. The incessant fighting between the cable network's most opinionated anchors — Keith Olbermann, Joe Scarborough and Chris Matthews — marred the chance to retain all those new young viewers Olbermann has attracted over the past year or two. But now that the other shoe has dropped, with the anchor team of Olbermann and Matthews being replaced by comparatively neutral White House correspondent David Gregory, it would be a mistake to think MSNBC has undergone some sort of deep existential crisis that will pull it back from the brink of becoming the Fox News Channel of the left. The network's ratings growth, driven by Olbermann, has been too good and too long coming, and the lefty anchor (according to the Times) is about to re-up his plush contract, which in any case has three of four yeas left on it. And MSNBC will have done plenty if it simply gets its big-name blowhards acting at a high school level of maturity rather than yelling at one another like a bunch of kindergartners. Network executives appear to appreciate this! From the Times:
In interviews, 10 current and former staff members said that long-simmering tensions between MSNBC and NBC reached a boiling point during the conventions. âMSNBC is behaving like a heroin addict,â one senior staff member observed. âTheyâre living from fix to fix and swearing theyâll go into rehab the next week.â
...According to three staff members, Jeff Zucker, chief executive of NBC Universal, and Steve Capus, president of NBC News, considered flying to the Republican convention in Minnesota last week to address the lingering tensions.Olbermann, by the way, told the Washington Post he never really wanted to be an anchor in the first place:
"Phil and I have debated this set-up since late winter/early spring (with me saying, 'Are you sure this flies?' and him saying, 'Yes, but let's judge it event by event') and I think we both reached the same point during the RNC," Olbermann said by e-mail.
How Joe Zee Gets Celebrities Naked [Protocelebrities] .
After foolishly losing hold of megastar editor and Project Runway judge Nina Garcia, Elle has been scrambling to recreate its TV buzz with a reality fashion show called Stylista, in which contestants vie to become a fashion editor. The presumptive star of this effort, Anne Slowey, starts with several strikes against her. She did an unconvincing Miranda Priestly imitation in an embarrassing trailer for Stylista; looked like the loopy hippie to Garcia's polished fashion plate in a New York magazine profile and some Web videos; and came up through the ghettoized editorial side of Elle rather than the fashion side. Enter Sunday's Page Six Magazine profile of Elle creative director Joe Zee, "the celeb whisperer" who, face it, is poised to be Elle's real breakout TV star, Slowey be damned. There are any number of reasons, but you can start with the fact that Zee got Scarlett Johansson and Keira Knightley to pose naked together in Vanity Fair:
Although we've wondered whether Zee makes Elle too gay, he comes complete with long-running connections with J. Lo, Justin Timberlake and Sarah Jessica Parker plus a Horacio Alger, immigrant-makes-good biography. And he apparently also has a silver tongue. Here's what he told Page Six about the naked Vanity Fair shoot:
âKeira and Scarlett really were naked [in front of the cameras] for a while, but they got it. You have [photographer] Annie Leibovitz, you have Tom FordâI think the girls realized that they were in trusted hands. Itâs not Playboy. They knew it would be interesting and artful. Plus, Tom Ford [guest edited this issue and he] is incredibly visual and incredibly specific. He wants to direct movies now, and no doubt heâll be phenomenal at it.âZee also bends other celebrity women to his will, through the magic of, uh, listening. Tricky and clever! Here's how it works:
âI identify with big personality women like Jennifer, Madonna, Mariah,â Joe says of the connection he has with stars. âI love their style, but I also love their careers, the decisions they makeâall those things that make them who they are. Maybe itâs because I treat them as three-dimensional, successful women with real ideas, not as models.â
At the moment, though, J.Lo looks as comfortable in front of the camera as any career catwalker. Itâs not the first time the pair has collaborated: Joe styled her for every W cover sheâs shot over the years and for her album art for 2001âs J.Lo. Today, she rolls her caramel shoulders and tosses her hair before photographer Carter Smith as Joe stands nearby, directing her while chewing furiously on a piece of gum. âGorgeous with your arm up like that,â he shouts. âHot! Hot! Sheâs smokinâ!âYou know what else Joe Zee is good at, besides fashion? Name dropping!
Times Abandons Discretion For Palin [Journalismism] .
Wait, is it really the New York Times that assigned at least four reporters to essentially investigate those conspiracy theories about how Sarah Palin didn't really give birth to her son Trig? Because while internet rumors are never mentioned in the Times's lengthy Palin baby story this morning, it's hard to imagine any other reason the newspaper went to such great lengths to write about Palin's fifth and most recent child, despite a lack of cooperation from the Republican vice presidential candidate. The Times has not always been so eager to delve into the private lives of politicians, as John Edwards well knows! The bottom-line on Palin, for those who study intricate flow charts about why she took such a lengthy trip home when childbirth seemed imminent, or wonder why there are precious few photos of her pregnant:
Palin concealed her pregnancy for months, and concealed for a time the fact that the baby had Down syndrome (her 14-year-old daughter didn't know until she laid eyes on the infant). But the Times appears to have spoken with two governors who confirm she was pregnant during her trip to Texas. And it also found a doctor who said her long trip home was potentially unsafe for the baby:
A woman with symptoms like Ms. Palinâs should be examined to determine her condition, said Dr. Laura Riley of Massachusetts General Hospital. The long trip home could have posed a risk, âbut the odds were still in her favor that everything would be O.K.," said Dr. Susan E. Gerber of Northwestern University.If you're looking to cover up a pregnancy, scarves and parkas apparently work well:
The couple decided to keep quiet about the pregnancy so they could absorb the news, they told people later.
And there were political factors to consider. âI didnât want Alaskans to fear I would not be able to fulfill my duties,â Ms. Palin told People magazine last week.
The governor, thin to begin with, began an elaborate game of fashion-assisted camouflage. When Vogue photographed her, five months pregnant, for a profile in January, she hid in a big green parka. At work, she wore long, loose blazers and artfully draped accessories.
âAll of a sudden she had this penchant for really beautiful scarves,â recalled Angelina Burney, who works across the hallway from the governor in Anchorage.So the Times, whose editor at one point refused to "recycle" the Edwards story because it originated in the National Enquirer, is now lifting a quote from People magazine. But this is an important issue — how can we select a vice president if we don' know all the details of her childbirth??
[Times]
Magazine Ads Explained: They Sell Things! [Media] .
The total number of magazine ad pages fell more than 7% in the first half of this year. So the magazine industry says to itself, "You know what we need to sell more magazine ads? An ad campaign." Makes sense, right? And so does the message of this new campaign: "Magazine ads: they make people want to buy things." They're not beating around the bush here, people. Naturally, a big part of this new campaign is online. Hypocrisy in action? Not really!:
The new ad campaign (including the pictured spot, which shows, apparently, my apartment), is nothing but images of people who bought a lot of shit after they read about it in an imaginary mag. But all the spots are designed to drive traffic to a website where there are a lot more stats on magazine advertising's effectiveness. Is this ironic, considering online ads are one major reason for the decline in magazine ads?
Actually no, since part of the appeal of magazine ads is their ability to drive traffic to websites. It's right there, on the website! Also, magazines are far less threatened by the migration of advertisers to websites than newspapers are, because magazine ads are more appealing as a physical thing. Newspapers are the canaries in the ad coal mine. So magazines have nothing to worry about until newspaper advertising starts drying up, which... oh, right.
The Times explains this mysterious business like so:
The goal is to show that advertising in magazines encourages consumers to consider buying products â a phenomenon known as purchase intent â and stimulates them to go online to shop or to learn more about items they might want to buy.
Novel!
[NYT]
Which Politician Uses His Clout to Sleep With Actresses? [Blind Item Roundup] .
Proving that these Blind Item Roundups need not always deal with frivolous Hollywood antics, today we have a juicy (and important) item about a politician. Yes, politics! I mean, it's about how said politician uses his status to sleep with actresses, but still. And, you know, we also have stories about a drunk musician, a benevolent comedian, and a closeted lesbian. So, enjoy.
1) "Which A-lister got so trashed prior to Fashion Rocks, she could barely walk in a straight line down the red carpet and had to be eased into her seat? Organisers also located an emergency sick bag in case she vomited." [< a href="http://www.mirror.co.uk/celebs/3am/wickedwhispers/2008/09/08/3am-s-naughty-but-nice-wicked-whisper-115875-20728398/">Mirror]
2) "To show that not all men behave badly, I thought I would share this little kindness about a B- list comic film actor with a franchise which you would think would make him A list under the rules, but, then you would all laugh. So, anyway, our actor when he goes to dinner parties at restaurants or even at the houses of friends, has all the doggie bags given to him, and passes them all out to homeless people he sees on the way home. In addition to that, he will also raid the dinner parties for extra food and bring it to homeless shelters to serve." [CDaN]<
